I am a sucker for trash tv, from Footballers Wives to Love Island I LOVE them all, so when I heard that the Vardy v Rooney trial was going to become a staged play, I couldn’t wait to watch it.
If you don’t know the beef surrounding Rebekah Vardy and Coleen Rooney, then here is a brief synopsis . . . In 2019, Rooney released a statement on her socials accusing Vardy of leaking posts from her private Instagram account to the British newspaper The Sun, then in 2020, Vardy sued Rooney for libel (here is Google’s definition of “Libel” – a published false statement that is damaging to a person’s reputation; a written defamation). The case then came to trial in London in May 2022, and that’s what the play is all about, 7 days condensed showing us all the juicy bits.
I absolutely loved the way the story was portrayed on stage, the set was very minimalistic and didn’t change throughout, acting as a court room with the added glam of clear transparent ghost style chairs which were in fashion some years ago (adding that WAG element to the show), and topped off with a football pitch floor which came into its own when the frenemies lawyers “scored” a legal point in the courtroom.
Lucy May Barker plays the role of Rebekah Vardy, and she was HILARIOUS, I can’t say I have ever seen Vardy speak in real life, but Barker’s portrayal of her had me and the audience in stitches. Laura Dos Santos plays the role of Coleen Rooney, and nails the scouser accent, and the surgical boot Rooney wore at the beginning of the trial was in full view.
The drama is narrated by two pundits played by Halema Hussain and Nathan McMullen who honestly were the glue to the show, they kept popping up to give context around some of the legal jargon and filled any gaps in the story. Both actors also played other roles in the play, notably McMullen plays Wayne Rooney and Jamie Vardy who briefly pop in (funny rather than accurate impressions, but I appreciated the comedy).
Another highlight for me was Coleen Rooney’s Lawyer David Sherborne played by Tom Turner, who had some fantastic facial expressions, and perfectly executed one-liners. I really enjoyed this play, the attitude Barker and Dos Santos gave during their performances, the designer handbags and trashy comedy, all my vibe.
This WAGtastic courtroom panto ends this week at Theatre Royal Brighton, click HERE to book tickets.